7.16.2010

just trust my lust...its like a highschool crush sometimes awkward


They say what goes up must come down, but please don't let me fall -- wow, I listen to wayyyyyy tooo much music, and pull way to may lyrics from songs. I guess you could say I am getting back into "the swing of things" in the dating world. There is one person in particular that I have been spending a lot of time with -- I must admit I am digging every second. I am learning a lot about myself -- of course it is always important to learn more about how you interact with others, but sometimes your insecurities might burst out a little too much. I always worry that because I have such a large list of insecurities (from my body, to what I say, to how messy of an eater I am or how my shoes may not match my bow -- yes...they are that bad) that I have created an entirely new insecurity of being insecurity....ha...have I lost you yet?

The person that I have been hanging out with is genuine. I am constantly smiling, I can be myself. It feels comfortable...but, of course I am afraid to get tooooooo comfortable. This creates a problem. I have interpreted things a little different than they were communicated -- Oooooppppppsssss. I also have somewhat of a speed bump trying to make my adventure a little more difficult.

It makes me sad to see that the other person is thinking, but, you do not know what they are thinking of. Of course, I automatically assume that I must have just done something terribly wrong. Oi, this dating/lusting/crushing thing is turning out to be a lot more difficult that I remember.

I will admit that I am having the time of my life. I can jump on the bed and it is appreciated. I just want to smile, smile and smile some more. I am being treated like a princess -- nothing to really worry about -- it is awesome. I am trying not to get tooooo far ahead of myself because I don't want to get over excited.....But, I also don't want to be a silly sally and pass up greatness. He always says "Don't forget about me", but tonight I will say: You don't forget about me......


Much LUST

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