Broken heart syndrome

I have been in love twice. I have always been the heart breaker, and now I am the one with the broken heart. The idea of being done cannot seem good when I am in the heat of the moment. I figure it must be something I did....no matter how many times I am told it isn't. I thought that I couldn't cry anymore because my eyes had gone dry...but low and behold tears are dripping delicately off my cheeks on to the keyboard. My head is going a million miles an hour, but all my thoughts are blank. I want to wake up out of this horrible dream. I want to back to the days of adventuring with bottles of wine, and funny faces and jump hugs. I thought that this was going to last -- I just thought we had hit a low...evidently we had hit rock bottom. I feel like this has happened to early, I was not prepared. I feel like I am being kicked when I am down, but then again I have been down for close to the last year....Now I know that hurt that can take over ones mind, body and soul when their heart is shattered into a million little pieces. I can now check something off my bucket list, that being 'have my heart broken'. I never could wish this horrible feeling on anyone. I had found comfort, and letting comfort go while living such a rocky life only is going to leave me dazed and confused. My head is pounding. I don't understand the motives -- I am trying to figure out where I went wrong. I hate this. Where do I go from here? No band aid can fix this. I wish there was medicine for broken heart syndrome.

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